She / Her / Hers
To me, COMMUNITY means feeling comfort and support in sharing my truth and being vulnerable, knowing that others’ intentions are nothing short of genuine care, respect and championing. Community is shared interests and curiosity. It’s connection. It’s experience. It’s the folks who ease my anxiety.
For people who are strugglingwith their gender and/or sexual identity, those feelings of spiraling, uncertainty and groundlessness mean you’re on your right path to realization and truth.
In our society, there are expectations and “givens” that are assumed upon us based on our sex at birth, yet they aren’t always so given to some of us. They are ingrained in us as such, though, and so it took me time (20+ years) to realize that I’d never questioned these assumptions to see if they rang true for me. Once I did, I realized that they didn’t. This realization was a pivotal moment for me in adjusting my course away from what’s assumed and toward what feels true. It’s a journey and a process, and it’ll take time to really free ourselves from the assumptions, expectations and heartache we’ve lived under for so many years. It’s about patience and compassion with ourselves.
When it comes to gender identity, style and presentation, start small. Wear a new outfit around the comfort of your home. Then take it out on the weekend as you walk to get a coffee or visit another town/neighborhood. This will help you feel more comfortable bringing your true self out into the world while still feeling the comfort of not knowing anyone around. Then, when you’re ready, wear it to work, to an event, or out with friends!
If you are a young person who feels unable to be your authentic self due to your immediate circumstances, remember: There are people, places and spaces that accept you and will embrace you. They may not be immediately accessible but they exist. For now, find your moment of joy. Maybe it’s wearing what feels right around your room, or watching a TV show with a character you identify with, or listening to a song that fills your soul with hope and feet with dance. Find time for those moments; they’ll carry you through.
What STYLE should you buy? What's the difference?
YOU WILL NOT SEE "MEN'S" OR "WOMEN'S" SECTIONS ON OUR WEBSITE. SHOP STYLES - WITH A FLAT FRONT (E.G. OUR BOXER BRIEFS) OR WITH A POUCH SPACE IN FRONT (E.G. OUR TRUNKS) IF YOU WANT EXTRA ROOM.